I've been very fortunate to drop some weight very quickly, as I have done very well in my eating habits in the last few days. Today the scale showed me 182.2 lbs and I am very happy to be back within spitting distance of the 170s.
I had a really great lunch adventure today. I had brought my lunch to work of course, but then a fellow co-worker asked me to join her for lunch in our fancy cafe (my school has a great culinary program, so there is lunch available every day, and it's not your regular cafeteria food let me tell you) and whilst trying to build up my contacts and networking capabilities, I was loathe to turn her down. So I ate part of my lunch early, to stave off massive hungry as I walked down the buffet later. Once lunchtime hit, I filled my plate with mostly salads and a small piece of homemade cheese pizza. It was all delicious. Now usually at the cafe, I tell myself no dessert unless it's carrot cake. They always have big chocolate chip cookies and about 5 other luscious dessert options to choose from each day, so I tell myself only if it's carrot cake, and nothing else is an option. Heaven knows I really only like that and really rich chocolate desserts anyway, no sense eating that many calories if it's not REALLLLLLY good. Today they had a dense chocolate torte, homemade chocolate ice cream sundaes and.... carrot cake. How did I possibly stand a chance?
At this point, the usual head game began. First I tried to rationalize why I might deserv a treat. I'd done really well for the last few days, was planning on going for a run when I got home, played baseball last night, it was just one piece... My co-worker was also fighting the urge to pick up a piece of that delicious, moist cake. We asked someone else at the table who had just finished a piece if it was good enough to be worth it. She could've lied to us to help us out, but no, she suggested we just don't eat the thick icing. Right. However, that of course got my mind churning with further possibilities. Maybe I could split a piece with someone, or as suggested, leave the icing on the plate. It was just this one treat.
But then I remembered a little tidbit of inspiration I heard somewhere. Of all my resources, between podcasts, websites and books, I can't remember where I heard it, but it's what ultimately saved me today. I told myself that eating that piece of carrot cake would not be a desicion that would take me a step in the right direction towards achieving my goal. That piece of carrot cake was the opposite of achieving my goal. And I also knew that it likely wouldn't stop at that piece of cake, because then the floodgates would be open, and I'd want more sugar, and more desserts, and more more more. So I suggested to my co-worker that we get up from the table and head back upstairs to our office. And that we did. I had one Hershey's Kiss (one! Really? Just one?? I'm capable of that??) and that was the end of it. And that bag of Kisses sat in my briefcase all afternoon, but I didn't have any more. I was very proud of my decisions.
Even later when I came home, I poured myself a portion of those light airy butter twists, the ones that are barely 2 points for a big cupful, and instantly after I poured it, gave them to Nick* and decided to have lentil chips with roasted red pepper hummus. How did healthful foods become my preference? Probably when I realized they were much more flavourful than processed stuff.
I didn't end up going for a run tonight, but I'm ok with that. I'm learning to not beat myself up for my choices. I felt the need to just relax tonight, and it was worth it. No guilt.
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