Who Do You Think You Are Running Around Leaving Scars

I can't get out of my head! I am so convinced that I am incapable of doing this for the long haul, and therefore I can't get myself to commit to even trying at this point. Do I not want it bad enough? I want it bad enough to have it be something that has consumed me for most of at least 10 years, if not longer, but apparently not bad enough to just do it already. Weight Watchers just made me feel worse tonight; there were so many people with celebrations, and everyone seemed so happy with their progress and with the program, and I basically felt like an impostor for even being there. I hate that I am my own roadblock, I hate knowing that I am that roadblock and not knowing how to tear it down so I can move on and get beyond this. I wish I knew what words to type into that Google search that would provide me with the answers of what I needed to do and how I could get myself to do it, but I just don't. I feel so utterly and completely alone on this. I don't want to vent to Weight Watchers people because I feel like I am piling on so much more baggage than they should have to carry. There just doesn't seem to be anyone who can help me.... I feel like I'm waiting for the miracle answer that will suddenly flip the switch and on goes the lightbulb and everything is good from there on out. But of course I know that that answer doesn't really exist, no matter how hard I look. Weight Watchers isn't the answer, a personal trainer probably isn't the answer, and I doubt counseling is really the answer either. I'm it, I'm the answer to my own problem, but how can I get myself to follow through? There always comes a day, a week or two into things, where it all starts to unravel, and before I know it, I'm one step ahead and about 3 behind. I know all the right answers, I have the knowledge of what to do in certain situations, and yet I still fail. What else is there for me to? How do you fix yourself when you know the right answer and yet somehow you still choose the other path?